80th post-:

"Hell haveth no fury like a woman's Scorn"

Jill, Project group mate and friend


i finally have a taste a that.

And i dont like it.

Say all you want on your blog

Tell what you want to everyone

My concieous is clear

I did what i know is right

But ill caution you

Dont go overboard with what you asy

You tread on a thin line between insulting or just a harmless expression of views

Dont push your luck

Me keeping quiet dont mean i accept what you say

Im just trying avoid trouble

.......

Unlike you.

feel so broken today

i guess today is the day where ive reach a certain treshold

2 years of tension

all out today

broken

so broken

cant help but feel a tinge of sadness as the year end draw near every moment.

was reading my brudder xq blog just, on his "farewell" entry before he went in

haha, cant believe it lar, just last year new year

i was at his place playing call of duty 3 to day break

now both jy and xq is in the army.

feel so alone. doesnt help when im listening to slow sad music now(conicidence)

oh

i was running today when it rained on me, was at my 3 round, gonna complete 6km

dang,

didnt finsh the last round

dang.

christmas is coming, new year is coming

dont know how to spend these occassions this year

every year i got places to go, people to be with

this year is just desolate

haha

will you be my friend?

Lo and behold, im finally updating!!! haha

oh well, the year is finally ending, lar

the year has been good to me, achievements and all

first time go clubbing in singapore, went to DXO

hoping to see some chicks, saw some, just some

the alcohol there is crap, so watery

prefer the good old beer

and theres a tally of 2 slivers and 3 bronze for karate this year

inclusive is 2 regional medal, trying for the nationals.

hope to go SEA games next year.

and also get my driving liciense soon, i should stop procasicinating.

of course, i should try to update more often

2 of my bruuders are already going or is in the army, my turn soon.

oh yea, i should make it a point to dress better now,

tio suan by alot of ppl on the way i dress. Tsk!

Thanks jieyuan, Xiao quan, shirleen the whale, Marina, Vanessa, Maha bohdi recording Alumni, Sensei Mike, Springfield-Pingyi Band, titans alumni, seniors and juniors of Hayashi-Ha karate and people who i forgot to mentioned for making my 2006 a good year!!!!!

long time no post, events still happening, just over was the sports club camp lar. make you realise how bitchy a person can get to save her own hide lar. you though you know her after a few years in the same school but she still surprise you with unlimited 2 faced action and superb back-stabbing skills. not to forget lie-in-your face secret technique and lastly how can we forget the save-my-own-skin combo. put it all together you get a b.i.t.c.h yay

you know.....
whats really relaxing?.....

a cup of warm drink
a nice shower
the right temperature
nice music

never felth any better =>

long time no post. haha, anyway, i had a talk with my father just now, my grandma was comlaining about my sister which i totally agree about. i wont say what she did here cause its just not right lar.But instead i would wanna say what my father said. after lecturing my sister, he said that people in singapore is changing rapidly. we are becoming more and more like the western world. our culture and values are slowly being diluted in the sea of fast food and western believes. i do agree to it. he says that in the future, family relationships wil llast only 2 generations. the child and the parents, there wont be such thing call grandparents simply because they believe its their parents responsibility not theirs. im a stauch supporter of traditional confucious teachings on family values and i dont wish for that to happen. its like a cousin of mine, my uncle paid so much for him to go overseas to study but he then decide to migrate there and not come back anymore. How heart breaking it can be for my uncle. you bring him up, you support him, you put your entire CPF for him to study and he one day says oh ive found a life there, im not coming back. i feel sad for my uncle. i swear i will never treat my parents this way and ill make it a point to educate my child about real chinese values. just like how my father has taught me

alrite!!! heres my entry. started work in suntec for the IMF event. for 2 weeks i didnt have anything to do at all, everyday, play cards, majong, yes majong. ( my collegue brought his mini majong set to work) but well enough fun, work is starting tommorow (monday) formal and all. => my life? jsur came back from a karate tournement and got humilated by the damm taiwan national team......sian.....lost 8-0. my worst fight in my life. i couldnt even touch him man. sian........damm those taiwanese, no wonder china wanna wack them...haha just joking lar no offence to anyone. just me grumbbling. but i must admit they are good. they swept away most of the gold medals. never mind, will work hard now!!!!! i always tell my juniors i waited and lost 5 tournements before winning my first medal. haha dont want to stay dry for another 5 tournements again. that will be so sian man. anyway, i was hoping for buying a PSP on yahoo auction courtesy of vanessa. so anyone with a PSP to boot, drop me a tag!!! will blog again soon anyway

ok, this blog somehow became a monthly update thingy where so many people update almost every other day. i used to tell myself i didnt have the time to update but now i guess its just plain lazy lazy.*shugs. haha, xq was complaining im not updating my blog enough lar. ppl like him can update almost everyday. dont know how he do it. i was never keen about setting up a blog in te first place lar but i remember it was the year 2004, someone ask me to blog so i can keep people updated and let ppl know how i feel of certain issues in school so i happily started one. sidetrack a little, these few days was quite irritating. some stupid fighter jets and chinhooks and helicopters keep zooming pass my house. very very very irritating lar. 5 just flew past just now and is stil lflying pass -_-....... ah erm.....

was reading mh blog just now. was reading her past entries....hmmmm i should just conclude that curosity kills the cat lar, haha. anyway vanessa birthday is coming in a few days time. should think about getting her something....hmmmmm

wah its been so long since the sailing trip and i wanted to update this blog but unfortunately, i just cant find the discipline to do so. subsequently, more and more and events and things pile up, followed by projects, projects and more projects. terefore, no more update on sailing trip. haha. Projects been hell, finally get abit of time after 2 project submission today *thank god. 2 more project submission on friday fortunately, marketing priciples is 90% done and consumer behavior is 40-50% done.

weeks after the sailing trip was good even if there was the projects and the severe lack of sleep. world cup,project, world cup, project, world cup, project. and after the world cup finals, its projects all the way. tonight i shall have a good slp, then tomorow morning go hit the gym. yea.

and MH, thanks for everything this few weeks, the mental and moral support. dont have to say anything. even a smile and a simple jia you motivated me. haha, im gonna catch up this year for my results thanks to you => thanks MH

Im back from a 6 day sailing trip, darker, better, happier(surely much happier, thanks to that person) thinner(hopefully, havent weight myself~) and with a "jermen" slang ya? ill talk about that later so let me take a super deep breath and start talking about this trip. In summary i would call this sailing expedition a combination of OBS and sailing. yup, we've climbed rocks(real high ones) trek through untreked forest (got me some nasty cuts everywhere)and then of course lots of sailing. i mean LOTS LOTS LOTS LOTS and did i mention LOTS? its very enriching really, we get to learn navigation and steering the boat and guess what, when its ur watch, the captain dont help. so you can imagine sailing in the mindless ocean without seeing lan or knowing if you are going the right direction except using the GPS system and this compass globe. learnt lots about all these, waves, tide, direction, lots!

ok lets cut the chase and go to the story telling

day1.
crap, raining so we were delayed for few hours so end up setting off late. and when we finally set off, EVERYONE got sea sickness, there was lots of puking business going on everywhere ( i puked 5 times in a row and i mean continously) that cool huh? good for me, i became well after the puking while there were still many dead bodies around. we continued sailing through out the day, i cldnt eat anything so end up not eating the whole day. at night, we were split into watches and mine was the last watch. being the usual me, i didnt sleep at all through out. i helped the other watches too and had a chat with one of the crew, a german engineer, funny guy really, brings lots of laughter through out the trip. first day i made friends with 2 guys mainly "chairman mao" min zhe and "6 pointer" Jocius(dunno spell correct not) more fun to come later. ok i go slp now shall talk about the other days on the next FEW entries

happy birthday to me in 2 days time. this years up coming birthday gives new meaning to me or should i say since my 16th birthday onwards, every year i celebrate my birthday with a new condition to life. ok not excatly celebrate. when i was young, i always look forward to my birthdays. i always wanted to tell the world so i can get attention. yup, i loved attention in the past when i was younger but since my 16th birthday, every year is a big jump, like suddenly i have to grow up alot and i started to dislike people celebrating my birhtday or rather i want to play down my own birthday. every year means more reponsibility, more expectations, lesser time to achieve dreams, closer to dying. i am going to be 18 this year but i felt i did little to achieve anything in my life. i realised i always keep looking for achievements one after another. after one is done, do more things. do more things. and some more things. recently, theres this sailing expedition for NYAA gold. joining the sports club, dabbing a little in politics. i would somewhat like to spend my birthday this year in peace though but a promise is a promise friends, so ya........... happy birthday gim kai, time running out, time to do something be somebody.......

Ladys and gentlemen, lo and behold, im gonna be a grand uncle. oh yea, a grand uncle. can also be know as the brother of your grandfather.image that. jsut found out today, my nephew's wife (who is 20 this year ) is expecting a child AND another cousin of the same extended family gave birth (she is my age by the way) so my family is pretty confusing right now. i was tell me auntie (who by the way is that child's great grand aunt) that she would most likely see her great great grand child if this keep up. i appluad my cousins and nephews effort at answering to the nations call of having children.

serious now, both families arent well to do and they dont even sum up to gross income of 1500 per month. both guys are still in the army leaving their wives at home.

thoughts to keep in mind. dont be an idiot

WORLD’S WORST CYBER GAMES
Posted on Sunday, November 27, 2005
Topic: We, The Citizens
Now that the World Cyber Games are over, here’s a look at some games they rejected:

Grand Theft Auto: Sesame Street
King Kong: Plays Ping Pong
Need for Speed: Kena Saman
Star Wars: Battle to Scrape As Much Money From Stupid Kids as Possible
Dance Dance Revolution: Community Club Senior Citizen Line Dancing
Resident Evil (HDB edition)
FIFA Nonstop ‘Ole Ole Ole Ole’ Singalong 2006
Final Fantasy VII: The Cute SCGS Chick Who Sits Behind Me in the Bus Everyday That I Don’t Have The Guts to Speak To
Super Mario Mahjong Multiplayer Session
The Sims: Everitt Road
Tony Hawk: HDB Void Deck Handicapped Ramp Skate-o-rama
Pokemon Casino Poker Battle
Barbie: Bulimia in the Bathroom 2005
Extreme NASCAR: Tyre Pumchek on the AYE
Pimply Virgin Who Stays In His Room Whole Day Doing Donno What (Special Edition)
Tetris: Phua Chu Kang edition

66th entry

Its quite weird you know, life is falling unto place for me somewhat. 2nd in the All malaysian karate open, (karate checked) Committee member of titans alumni (band checked) Maha bodhi alumni just got approved (band checked again) A active class (school checked) smart group members...except for one (4 major projects checked). you aks yourself, whats missing from this list. hmmm.....it seems life is damm good. but being the unsatisfied and greedy me, blardy good friends (unchecked)temper control (unchecked for many years)
Sometime back 2-3 years ago, i once had a very good friend.....once had....haha, weird izzit it, arent good friends suppose to last? yes?,no? if it didnt last then would you still call him/her a good friend? haha i sound like a damm girl..... for those who keep asking me to update, pls back off, i will update as and when i like

Somewhat forgot i had a blog untill recently then i remembered. well what can i say? how can i compress a month and a half of events into this entry? well i shant. but waht im gonna do is list down the events really

1. SYF outdoor comp (gold) really happy for them happier when i got the gold myself.
2. school reopening. haha when you look forward to seeing pretty gals. its hard to accept when for both years no outstandind ones at all.
3. malaysian tournement- happy with my results got a sliver. a big glory for singapore. beat the malaysians who happen to be top 5 in the world. shall work harder. cause japan is the next stop! bye bye malaysia, ohiyo japan!

alrite, much have happened from the time i last updated. Life is rather hectic really. there was the band camp back at spf-pyss and also the tournament last sat. lets start with the camp. i wished i could stay but unfortunately my father did not allow.....zzzzzzzzzso bo bian, i crazily went every morning and return every night. well, if you ask me their progress, i can say that they are doing very well, so is the drum major. finally pulling his act together and about time too!! i guess we will know how well they will peform only on the day itself. the 4 days been quite efficient but the sky hasnt been that kind. the days were killing people. the band suffered quite a number of casualty. hmm.....8 people vomited, 1 with nose bleeding. ive been a little toasty too. now i fit the tall, dark handsome category!! (ok maybe not the handsome part but im almost there......)

and then there was the karate tournament. i dont know if god is trying to make a joke or what but here goes. i got a sliver for my weight category but failed to even go pass the first round of the open category. what a joke. my first 2 matched were rather short cause i knocked out both my opponents. i actually dont have the intention of knocking them out but however they just fall themselves. the final i almost knock him out too. i wacked him untill he vomited but i guess he got quite a strong will. hehe BUT..... blardy hell the open category i want to knock him out but i wack and wack and wack and wack he still dont go down. then i almost got knocked out myself when he gave me a cresent kick to my face reuslting in torn lips. bleah. hurts like hell. our shin clash and clash but he still dont go down. super sian.....zzzzzz

next, i was just thinking how do people determine the depth of our blogs? do we have to dicuss world issues and have deep thoughts to show our depth? or the rattlings of our everyday life is actually enough? i personally do not like blogs that do not show maturity speaking of things like love who love who, miss who miss who or people who fake their maturity. HOWEVER its just personal thooughts and people might think im faking mine. SO SO, it all comes down to personal opinion~

hello, ok today im kinda roasted, admit havent been helping enough in the sun for the band, but it seems things are coming together for me back in the combined band. haha, its been a long while.....zack macework is finally coming together, haha, sure still can improve, and still trying to cope with my super packed holidays, obviously my parents are not happy abt me not spending time at home. thats something i dont understand. i mean, even if i stay at home, i would just play games , but outside i can do more meaningful stuff like helping the band, training karate and catch up with friends. but well, parents being parents, i think they feel like they have control over me if they see me in the house it gives them a sense of "security" haha this i must agree, but again, being their son for so long, i never give them problems about my life at all, just that i spend more time out. the only in the house who does it, what i do always make me the black sheep of the house, when i asked if i could learn piano, my parents gasp as if i asked if i could go kill someone. it sounds ancient to them. karate? to them is tt i have an interest in hurting my family one day. help the sec sch band? seems to them i have too much time to spend and apparently its none of my biz wax anymore. bleh. as much as i say i dont want to care, its just a lie to myself, how can i, after spending 4 wonderful and fruitful year say i dont care?> haha impossible......

lets see.....now its the holidays suppose to be very free, but how come like got so many things squeeze together? class chalet, karate tournement, 2 cousins wedding,(big events cause our family quite close) yup. made a point to train seriously this 2 months and yup i got my endorsement for the NUS invitational, thought must persuade and persude BUT it was done within 5 mins! and how come all the games i though is nice turn out like shit. just buy this game call Knights of the temple, play awhile got very irritated with the autosave system, turn off liao still will appear, arrghghg, waste money. and then there was the combined band practice. doesnt look good at the rate zack is progressing.....i dont know what to do, it seems that he reached a bottleneck, encouragemnt dont work, scoldings wont work, so what now? i know he lacks the blardy self confiddence when he do his stuff but how to instill confidence? he is the DM already, if he needs motivating then its bad news. headache lar......and finally i watch huo yuan jia today. ya finally after so long. bleh. very nice show. the spirit of martial arts. haha good one. practised abit of piano. and played some games, tommorow got training. Gambate to myself. (sounds weird)

a billion years ago i updated my blog, and now, a billion years after, im here again. was thinking of updating quite a few times but was kinda lazy. yup thats the extend of my laziness. Haha. lots of things happened since i last updatyed. hmmm lets start with the most recent one. Exams over!!! yay!!!!! after todays paper, we went to eat, and me and wei bin (classmate) were like drunk man, haha expecially me, singing hokkien songs at the top of my voice while walking down a long windy path. talk crap sing crap. i sung something about riding on a white horse haha. sen cia pai bae.hahaha. naturally high, never felt like tt for so long maybe cause exam over already. and then i finallt went the 2nd training of the year few days back. god...my body aches like siao. i shall not ke kiang in training anymore. and people, its official. i am addicted to rome total war. blardy good game even during exam period i also play. im mad. oh valentines? nothing much really, had a buffet with my class singles club. kinda cool, ate like a pig who never eat for a long time. good place, yuki yaki at cine. worth the money for the buffet. and even before that watched jarhead with xiao quan while getting the VCD called crying out from the center of the earth. a touching a nice show too but not my first choice,i wanted tales of the bizzare budden blardy hell search for that whole particular week also cannot find. not online either. bleh. ok i shall update again SOON i promise since i got more time now. haha im talking to myself. realised i dont usually post bad things on my blog or bad events. sometimes its not i dont want to but somethings are better left alone. cause when i type it out it brings back the pain and whatever.

Gim kai signing off

come to post obviously got thing happen right. so ya lets start with new year. everyone is growing up except me. the only teen still playing with the kids and im actually having fun!!!! oh my god....something is wrong but i cant deny i like kids. this yr is duller in a way. 2 of my young cousins are getting married one 19 the other 22. haha my aunts and friends were asking when my turn and i say wait after NS then say lar. and then there awas CHINGAY. haha it was fun while it lasted. cant believe after months of regular practice, the event is over just like that. its like as if going to people's association is a must do thing every week then. suddenly i feel an empty feeling in my heart like a chunk of it is missing. and i finally realised why i always keep myself occupied with activities untill im so packed.piano, karate, chingay, projects. when things end, i tend to quickly find a replacement to it cause i hate that empty feeling. kinda like when friends and friends were no longer as close anymore. but that......is something that cannot be replaced easily. i was hopping and hoping of finding bosom friends in poly, but i guess not yet. it just never came. im not saying i got no friends there but i just know those wont last. once we change classes, so will our relationship with each other. its always nice to have someone to always hang out with.just hang around. haha. give up lar, as the chinese put it. "yi qie shui yuan" leave it all to fate.


it made me think after an incident that happened few days back. must there be a motive for friends to become good friends? and improve so on up the level? is it possible for the opposite sex to become best friends without involving any possible love relationship? whats happens after the love? many questions. somewhat i though i knew then answer back then, but i guess its time to think again. the next time im on better terms with a female, i should be more careful.

oh the ice queen says she talks in class now, a big change really and she actually inititates some wacky ideas. so unlike her. wah seh, teacher talking you also talk hor. last time like ice mountain like that, want to talk to you like so difficult. now like so lively and bubbly. the change is good and stop saying u wanna change back cause that will never happen. ultimately its the crowd you mix with. unless u telling me you gonna change crowd. *ive came across your old blog =>

i like this nice jap show, crying out from the center of the earth budden i cant bear to watch. too touching. dont really like tt feeling stuff. but the stroy line is good.

anyway, how do we define if one is mature enough? by age quantity? by the measure of ones intelligence? the depth of his words? how? how do you know you are actually matured enough to do the things you think you can do? are you ready to accept whatever outcome of your actions? i believe we can see a growing trend of "little big people" or "xiao da ren" where kids the age of 13-15 start acting like adults. but are they actually who they act? we never know. can someone tell me what is the correct unit of measurement of maturity?

Gim kai draws his gladius and charged into the deep unknown

aye was thinking of going to chinatown for a walk before the chinese new year, been a few years since ive been there simply because i hated crowds but i guess this year should be an exception, just really feel like taking a look. should be interesting but i dont think i can get anyone to go with me...haha been playing Rome total war, i realised i can fight wars but cannot govern. would want to get a better computer if i can, a mini-fidge then my room wld already be self substainable!!!!! (except the toliet lar)

Chinatown anyone?

ahhh peeps, when was the last time i updated?? long long time ago i guess...decided when i feel like it then i continue my life story. anyways, life have been good, first time failed my mid sem test in poly, statistics, haha maths stuff, something i m never good at and never will be! spent my christmas in a cab on the way home, my new year couunting down at vanessa's house then to XQ hse to kill some german facist. now now, resolutions for 2006? im 18!!!! (gonna be) so i want to get my driving license, so well in school, be a better person, help old people across the road, help small people across the road, help pretty people acorss the road. the list goes on....but again when do we actually stick to our resolutions? at least i never. somewhat things dont go your way ya? and well its another year, and i should reflect upon it => . for one made me realise people change quickly or is it just me who is slower then the others? thoughts thoughts, so many thoughts so lazy to type em down.
how do i want my life to be this year? fun nevertheless, but i pray that i will grow up somemore....apparently my thoughts are above my peers but my father still thinks im a mindless child who knows nothing...blah, his comparing me to those part-timers he hired... well, also i want it to be activity filled~ joined up for Chingay and NDP and piano (i wanna be a jazz pianist~) i wanna do well in em especially piano. somehow taking piano lessons have proven again that i have no talent or whatsoever in music., shall try to post more often, and to those that read my blog do tell me what i always never add in my updates, thanks or wat u guys wanna know..(haha who reads ur stupid blog?)

ahhh peeps, when was the last time i updated?? long long time ago i guess...decided when i feel like it then i continue my life story. anyways, life have been good, first time failed my mid sem test in poly, statistics, haha maths stuff, something i m never good at and never will be! spent my christmas in a cab on the way home, my new year couunting down at vanessa's house then to XQ hse to kill some german facist. now now, resolutions for 2006? im 18!!!! (gonna be) so i want to get my driving license, so well in school, be a better person, help old people across the road, help small people across the road, help pretty people acorss the road. the list goes on....but again when do we actually stick to our resolutions? at least i never. somewhat things dont go your way ya? and well its another year, and i should reflect upon it => . for one made me realise people change quickly or is it just me who is slower then the others? thoughts thoughts, so many thoughts so lazy to type em down.
how do i want my life to be this year? fun nevertheless, but i pray that i will grow up somemore....apparently my thoughts are above my peers but my father still thinks im a mindless child who knows nothing...blah, his comparing me to those part-timers he hired... well, also i want it to be activity filled~ joined up for Chingay and NDP and piano (i wanna be a jazz pianist~) i wanna do well in em especially piano. somehow taking piano lessons have proven again that i have no talent or whatsoever in music., shall try to post more often, and to those that read my blog do tell me what i always never add in my updates, thanks or wat u guys wanna know..(haha who reads ur stupid blog?)